April 9, 2008 § 5 Comments
Since the time I’ve discovered mine, I’m very interested to know what one thing around you or on you gets abused when you’re trying to focus on something that deserves this kind of undivided attention span.
I knew of a friend who used to curl strands of his hair while trying to concentrate and the next we remember he had them all shaped into ringlets! Ok that’s somewhat hyperbolized, but trust me you could see his hands forming a pattern across his skull in his sacred moments of absorption. And then there are other crazy things too.
Anyway, it’s been a while I figured out that I bite into the side of the index finger of my left hand. It revealed itself when I noticed this small patch of rough skin at the location just stated. The first impulse was of tiny panic on the possibility of a skin rash or worse, herpes! And soon after, one day while reading from the screen I caught myself into the act. But I must tell you, that little find made me happy for reasons I don’t know.
And these days, I’ve begun to treat that as an object of vanity! Mostly at times when things you call your own reduce to single-digit cardinality. Blah.
April 8, 2008 § 1 Comment
if it lives still
the poetry that was
the belief I could do a little.
It was love
and rain too
sometimes just the ennui
of existence, of what and who.
It was life
and the romance of it
‘t was all around me then
when words were faithful to rhyming lit.
Alas! That didn’t last
there’s rain and it rains love even so
Verse now seems lost on me
when did the reason to evolve suffered a blow?
This is not poetry
it’s just noise in motion
with such chaos in my mind
sense is taking me for a dear run.
April 5, 2008 § 4 Comments
I’ve been listening to ‘Iris’ (from ‘City Of Angels’) for a few minutes now. The song is one of my personal favorites thanks to the powerful music that bursts right into your eardrums (best experienced with headphones) with such force that if you’re in the right mood, you’ll want to bleed your fingers on the strings yourself and pushed crazier with the flowing crimson. Add to it the fact that Meg Ryan features in the movie video and that she’s been one of my maiden Hollywood crushes and that I still find her strangely attractive (despite having been strongly ho-hummed about it) and she continues to be my wallpaper on a machine at some place I work etc etc. That also reminds me that I’ve been planning to learn some with a guitar for a while now. But then, that’s one of the ten thousand things I want to do with my life. Sigh.
It rained madly in Delhi today. Late afternoon time. I think that’s one of the best things about this city. Just as you settle into the daily routine of living it up with grime all around and just as it begins to get all melancholic-y, it comes back to you with a tiny little surprise that makes you fall back in love right away. Even though now there’s this mud everywhere that falls over me irrespective of me stepping into it or not, and the mosquitoes will copulate like minks (which, by the way, is a phrase I still don’t understand. It was first mentioned to me in Basic Instinct where the couple’s excessive lovemaking found an interesting parallel with the animal kingdom. Anyway, I mustn’t challenge the usage ..Hollywood makes the rules), and that I miss the girl being with whom would be so much lovelier in such romanticized weather, and that tomorrow morning I’ll have to go trembling head-first-for-five-minutes in the shower, I still love the drenched city. It’s so beautiful. The air. The people. The skin. The trees. The roads. Everything.
I’m not going to like leaving this city for like forever. If I mean.
I was also catching up with a couple of friends from college today after a reasonably long time. And I think I finally see how people change over time. Particularly after moving out to different environs. I missed this observation after school, primarily because I met few friends once in college in a different city myself. I hate not keeping in touch with more of them today. Anyway, so it’s fairly interesting to see how people now have stronger and more selective opinions about things that didn’t bother us much back then. How we’re all growing up in this world. According to this world. Some know where they’re going. Others like me, well, go living on the edge..
I’ve been pretty disturbed health-wise for about a week now. And then out of sheer boredom I think I have read more health related articles than I have in my entire life before this last week! I’m starting out slow. I hope to go far this time. I must be concerned about this anyway, or I’d be old and sick and despised in no time. But just last evening they said too much water ain’t a good thing as was believed for I think as long as I’ve been born. May be that was just an environmentalist gimmick. Save-the-planet. Don’t-flush first. Drink-less now. May be.
Crazy world. What are we even doing living the way where everything we think or love or want or might love and want is compromised.